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Anonymous asked: Please can you do one for my friend for her birthday I will pay you it has to say Happy Birthday Tina, from all the letters of the alphabet x
Sure I will! When do u need it?
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CORDEN SET TO SELFISHLY RUIN CHRISTMAS WITH SHIT NEW BOOK
James Corden’s new book ‘Can I Have your Attention Please’ is set to send a wave of disappointment over the faces of thousands of brother-in-laws this Christmas, in the same way as the book 'Crap Towns’ did last Christmas. One man told Alphabetti Spaghetti News about when his brother-in-law presented him with the gift last year.
“It completely ruined the day. I was expecting a garden centre voucher or a nice cheese, but instead I was given this %(_:;”*ing book. That two weeks spent building a patio together in the summer had obviously meant nothing to him. I spent the rest of the day crying in the downstairs toilet" Craig - Brentwood.
Since Craig-Gate, extra staff are being positioned in the book section in Asda to offer the advice “how about a nice cheese or a garden centre voucher?” to anyone seen reaching for the book.
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Anonymous asked: why dont you do all the zodiac signs? i was so excited and then oop, no cancer.
Hey anon!
Well the thing is, I was going to do an unbelievably epic Cancer one for my friend that landed on his birthday, but I didn’t. I’m sorry. And the other reason is; I do whatever I want!
Yours,
Betty
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Congress Rules Alphabetti Spaghetti is a Vegetable
The United States Congress controversially ruled that Alphabetti Spaghetti’s tomato sauce content qualified it as a vegetable, thus answering once and for all the question of whether Alphabetti Spaghetti is a fruit or a vegetable.
Heinz spokesperson Jean Hackman was quick to cash in on the ruling and recommended everyone get their 57-a-day.
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arraic-blog asked: Oh, I miss this blog!! I never know what to request for you to write though hahah
Thank you! I’m back! I’ve got a new writer now joining me, it’s Bobby Alpha! Although he doesn’t like that name - whatever it’s my blog. WATCH THIS SPACE.
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Ok guys, I know I haven’t done the news in ages on alphabetti on toast, the truth is I’ve been busy setting up my own business! I’ve now got a shop inside a caravan, selling zines, art prints, jewellery, vintage items and general cool stuff.
So betwixt sleeping, eating and working I have had little time to let my mind wonder into alphabetti spaghetti land. But, in reference to the sperminator post which I’m sure you all recall, I’LL BE BACK.
Soon.
But for now. Please. Check out my shop. And follow the fuck out of me. http://caricaribou.tumblr.com
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shure-jan asked: You're a fucking genius.
Oh, stop! :)
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psychotropicpolitics replied to your photo:
John Lennon in spaghetti. Will the joys of…
will you do a spaghetti portrait of someone for me?Ha ha! Yes! Send me a message. (veronica mars?)
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gunstargreen replied to your photo:
John Lennon in spaghetti. Will the joys of…
these are very goodYep, well 4 years of art school…y'know.
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John Lennon in spaghetti. Will the joys of spaghetti ever tire for me? No.
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The Virgin Mary and Child. In spaghetti.
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Anonymous asked: Got any beans?
Yes, but I have to keep them in a separate cupboard otherwise they fight. Joker.
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Dear Chris,
Unexpected testicle
Love Ariel
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Dear Mr Anonymous
If you’re writing me a message for me to put on alph spag, please don’t be anonymous because if you are - I won’t be able to ask you questions like ‘Is that how you’re spelling that really?’ and stuff like that.
it should be like this:
Hello Lordette of all hilarious alphabetti spaghetti amazingness. Can i have this sent to blah@blahblah.com / OR can you put this on the blog thanks “(insert some message about wanting to shag your best friend)” Thanks I owe you big time.
So anon, if you want me to do your message just msg me again saying what you want me to do with it and your contact details.
Love Betty
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Got a message for someone but you’re not sure how to say it? Hit me.
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Got a message for someone? Not sure how to say it? Hit me.
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VIRGO
A full denim outfit is NEVER not a mistake.
RETHINK THAT SHIT.
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Anonymous asked: cancer, pleeease!
Well why not!
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Anonymous asked: you did pisces before virgo?! virgo is not impressed.
Aah. I fucked up. I’m sorry virgo. Please accept my apology, pleeeaase!
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Pisces:
For maximum results..
